How Come No Women Have Attacked Me?

I think I‘m going to have to sue the makers of AXE for false advertising. Have you heard of this product? This stuff is a whole line of hygiene products for men that has hit the store shelves in the past year. In this month’s issue of Maxim magazine there was this little sample packet of a new “Body Wash” they’re introducing, called Snake Peel. It has those little gritty things in it, what’s that called Exfoliant, I think, and it contains cactus oil. Anyway, since the sample was free, I tried it. The little gritty things dissolve after a few seconds, it lathered real well, and OK, I admit it, I thought it smelled pretty good, so I even bought some the next time I went to the market.

So what’s the problem? Well, if you’ve seen any of the commercials on TV for these type of products from these companies, a few minutes after applying it, these guys in the commercials have women attacking them in the supermarkets, ripping their clothes off in parking lots, and basically trying to jump their bones every time they turn around. I’ve been using this stuff for over a week now, and you know what?

NOTHING

Nope, not 1 women has attacked me, or tried to rip my clothes off in public. I even walked around the supermarket for 2 hours last Saturday (OK, maybe it wasn’t actually 2 hours), and NOT ONCE did any woman try to tackle me and tear my shirt off WHAT’S UP WITH THAT? This is definatlely false advertising, and fraudulent marketing.

Still…… I’m not sure if it’s the Exfoliant, OR the Cactus Oil, or what, but I do like the way it makes me feel, post shower, and maybe I'm just not patient enough. You see, this morning at our daily morning ops meeting out on the manufacturing floor, I overheard one of the female program managers who was standing nearby, whisper to her friend “Gee, somebody smells good today”. I just smiled, and said nothing.

Maybe there’s hope yet :-)